Don’t Feel Sorry for Donna Mosley

On June 19, 2015 By Rev. Dr. Jarrett BanksIn Memorials2 Comments

In Memory of Donna Marie Mosley

Perhaps the worst thing we can do on this day is to do what we instinctively believe we should do; do the thing that comes most naturally for us today. One of the worst things we can do is put what we have been doing these last few days, and possibly doing throughout Donna’s life, into some sort of formal expression. I believe that the worst thing we can do today is to feel sorry for Donna.

Born nearly blind and with cerebral palsy, to say that Donna struggled throughout her life would be an understatement. But if you ever asked Donna if she thought people should ever feel sorry for her, she’d shake her head and emphatically say, “Naaw!”

But, against her wishes, that is exactly what we are inclined to do. Oh, poor, poor, poor Donna. Born with disability, she struggled to finish high school and attend Pitt Community College, only to never have a career, an IRA or own a 401-k.

Poor, poor, poor Donna. She never got married. She never knew the joy of parenthood. She was to never be a grandparent.

Poor Donna. She never really lived on her own, never owned her own home, never possessed her own car. She was never self-supporting, self-sufficient.

Pitiful Donna. She suffered with so many chronic health problems; she was never able to be physically active. She never hiked a mountain, swam in a river, cycled in the country or ran a 5k.

Oh, poor, pitiful Donna. She suffered so much loss in her life: the tragic death of a father, the untimely death of a mother, and just recently, the slow and painful death of her beloved brother, Albert.

Poor, poor Donna. She suffered so much these past few years and even more these past few months, and she died, so young, just days shy of just her 54^th birthday.

This is our natural inclination: to pity Donna, to sympathize with Donna. Because according to the world’s standards of success, Donna simply did not measure up. But if you ever asked Donna how she was doing, even in her final hours when she was barely able to say a word, Donna would always respond: “Doing good.”

I would visit her during these last few months confined to a bed, her body unable to absorb any nutrients or electrolytes, on oxygen, broke out with a rash from her medication, and immediately after she told me she was “doing good,” she would ask: “How’s the preacher? How’s Carson and Sara? What is Ms. Lori up to?” Just like her beloved brother Albert, I never once heard Donna utter a single complaint, regret, or resentment.

“Donna, should anyone feel sorry for you?”

“Naaw! Don’t feel sorry for me. I have had a great life. Yes, I was born with disabilities, I have had my share of struggles, maybe more than my share, but I was born into a family and into a community that gave me everything I ever needed and wanted.

Yes, I was born with disabilities, but ask anyone who remembers me as a child, walking all over this town, even with cast on my leg! Yes, I was born with poor vision, but if I hadn’t been, the Lion’s Club would have never given me my dog Brandy who traveled to New York City with me.

No, I never had a lucrative career, but I was able to finish school, even go to college and work a little. I was able to fulfill a dream of teaching in a classroom. I was able to work some in the public library and even able to help out Bro in Avon on the fishing pier. And no, I have never had any money. But the good things in life, the truly important things in life, do not come with a price tag.

No, I never got married, never had children, but I have had many priceless relationships. Because of my friends and family, I have never felt unloved or unwanted. Because of these relationships, I have never once doubted that any of my needs would not be met. And, seriously preacher, who can really ask for anything more?

I never owned a car, but I went anywhere I wanted to go. I have never been able to run like you Jarrett, climb a mountain, or swim in the sea, but I bet I have been to more concerts and met more famous people than you. I think it surprised my nieces when some of the members of the Cravin’ Melon group called me by name and spoke to me at that Michael Jordan golf tournament!

I have been so many places, met so many people, some of them quite famous, from NASCAR and golf celebrities to Coach Dean Smith.

And yes, I have experienced loss, even tragic loss. But I have always had a strong faith and certain hope that I would see my loved ones again. My faith and hope was so strong when my daddy died, I was somehow able to console my brothers and sisters. You can ask Puddin’ about that.

I think that is why I always loved the song, ‘Somewhere over the Rainbow’ by the Band of Oz. I have always believed in a land and a life that is better than this one: One where the skies are always Carolina blue and all of your dreams come true.

And, although I may not have been ready to leave all of you so soon, I think this is why when Dan asked me on the phone in the hospital early this week how I was doing, although I could barely breathe and could hardly talk, I said, “Doing good.”

So, please whatever you do, even if you are attending my funeral, please do not feel sorry for me.”

I believe Donna Marie Mosley was a living testimony of Jesus’ first recorded sermon. Whereas some may look at her short life of struggle and draw the conclusion that she should be pitied, because she didn’t appear blessed or favored by God like some, in reality, as Jesus reminded us in the Sermon on the Mount, God looked upon Donna with favor, and truly blessed her in ways that few of us here have been blessed. And I believe this is the real reason that no matter her circumstance, no matter how bad she felt, or how hard it was for her to breathe, she said: “I’m doing good!” Jesus said:

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Whereas we may look at those with whose spirits are allowed to soar to achieve success as the world defines it as blessed and favored by God, the reality is that God looks with favor and blesses not those who are born with perfect bodies, 20/20 vision, and silver spoons, but those whose spirits have many challenges and obstacles. And notice that Jesus uses the present tense. Not they will be blessed. Not might be blessed. They are, right now, right here, on this earth blessed. And their future is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.

Whereas we may look at those who have not suffered the tragic or untimely loss of loved ones as blessed and favored by God, the reality is that God favors and blesses the mourners who have experienced great loss, and God promises them comfort. This is the only explanation how Donna was such a comfort to so many of us during our times of grief.

Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.

The meek and the gentle are favored. Not the strong. Not the ones with the physical strength or the confidence to overcome all sorts of adversity and make it to the top. Blessed are the ones who have never made it to the top, never conquered anything, not even their own fears. Blessed are the ones who are dependent on the love and support of others. For it is the weak, the disabled, says Jesus, not the strong, who survive and inherit the earth.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness for they will be filled.

Not the ones who are righteous, but the ones on whose behalf the prophet Amos preached: “Let justice roll down like waters, and righteousness like an ever-flowing stream” (Amos 5:24). Blessed are the ones who thirst for justice. These are the ones, like the mentally and physically disabled, who have been unjustly judged, mistreated, shunned and even bullied by society. These are the ones society looks upon and says that they haven’t quite measured up. Jesus says that they are blessed. Jesus says that they are the ones who will not only have their thirsts quenched, but they will be filled, their cups overflowing.

Blessed are the merciful, for they will receive mercy.

Blessed, says Jesus, are the ones who are always putting the needs and welfare of others ahead of their own. Blessed are the ones who are suffering, yet when you ask them how they are doing, they immediately ask you how you and your family are doing. Blessed are the ones whose hearts are full of mercy and compassion, for God will give them mercy.

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.

Blessed are those who have the heart of a child: Those who see only the good in others; those who, even in their sufferings, have no bitterness, no complaints, and no resentments. Blessed are the ones who see not only their misfortunes, but see all of their blessings, for they will see God.

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.

Not the ones who have necessarily found the world’s peace for themselves, not the self-sufficient, the self-reliant, not the ones who own their own mortgages, have secured their own peace and security through material wealth and assets, but those who seek God’s peace, because they will find a home, a place of security, a place of rest and a place of peace that is beyond all understanding.

No, whatever you do this day, however you mourn, wherever you hurt, whenever your cry, whatever your inclination, please do not feel sorry for Donna. Because she is doing good. She is blessed beyond measure. And because she’s doing good, because she is blessed, although we may not feel like it, so are we.

Peace Be with You: Remembering Albert Mosley

On February 27, 2015February 28, 2015 By Rev. Dr. Jarrett BanksIn MemorialsLeave a comment

In the sixteenth chapter, the 33^rd verse of John’s gospel, we read words of Jesus that cannot be more true: “In the world you will have tribulation.”

Jesus didn’t say we might or we may have tribulation. Jesus said that we will have “tribulation.” Other translations read: “torment,” “trials,” “trouble,” “sufferings,” “distress” or “persecution.”

In this world, we will suffer. In this world, we will lose people we love, sometimes tragically. In this world, we will be injured, sometimes in terrible accidents. In this world, we will be diagnosed with sickness, sometimes with dreadful diseases. In this world, we will have failed relationships, sometimes divorce. Jesus said that in this world suffering is inevitable.

Albert Mosley could certainly testify to this truth.

Albert had just started high school here in Farmville when his father tragically committed suicide. Later, Albert, himself, would be critically injured on the football field. Years later, there would be the sudden and untimely loss of his mother, a risky back surgery, a grim diagnosis of Addison’s disease, broken relationships, the loss his best friend Ronnie Avery, incessant physical pain, diabetes, debilitating strokes and blindness.

Now, if this was the only testimony that Albert Mosley’s life could give, that in this world, we will have tribulation; then today would certainly be a sad and tragic day for all of us. However, the good news is that this was only a small part of Albert’s testimony.

Jesus said: “In this world, you will have tribulation.” Now, let’s read the entirety of this verse: Jesus said: “I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33).

After Albert lost his father, Albert did not hesitate to courageously become the man of the house, take care of and look after his mother, his six siblings, maybe especially, his little sister, Donna. Albert resonated with the great song by Clarence Carter, “Patches,” intentionally becoming the one that his family could always depend upon.

In spite of the tragic loss of his father and the increased responsibilities for his family, Albert somehow miraculously managed to excel in school. And in spite of some very good reasons to be bitter and angry, Albert possessed such a sweet and loving disposition that the girls in this town affectionately called him “teddy bear.”

However, I am certain that no one called him a teddy bear on the football field. Albert was an exceptional athlete, a strong, ferocious hitter. Perhaps football became the outlet for some of some of his anger that he had to have harbored. He hit someone so hard one night when Farmville was playing at Ayden, that it put Albert in the hospital where he was in a coma for three weeks.

And yet again, although he had even more reasons to become angry or bitter at life, Albert took heart and persevered.

After he recovered, he finished high school and went on to Atlantic Christian College, where he again continued to excel, earning the prestigious Top Hat Award. After college he went on to get a Masters in Education degree at Old Dominion University. Upon graduation, he taught school briefly until he was quickly promoted to principal.

Later, he became Vice President of the Virginia National Bank in Franklin, Virginia and in 1982 was awarded the “Boss of the Year” Award from the Franklin Jaycees. He was also awarded the #1 Jaycee President Award in the state of Virginia.

Then, as Jesus promised all of us, more tribulation would come to Albert, this time in the form of sickness and disease. However, in spite of every tribulation in his life, Albert always miraculously found a way to persevere, to love his life, and to love others. You could see it on the dance floor when you watched him Shag, Twist or do the Gator. In spite of everything, Albert was still the sweet, pleasant, fun-loving teddy bear.

I met Albert twelve or thirteen years ago. He had retired and moved back to Farmville to be with the family he loved. He had experienced many more ups and downs in his life. I watched him grieve deeply when his friend Ronnie passed away, and I witnessed his health continue to decline. The truth is that I have watched him suffer perhaps more than anyone I know. I cannot count the times I have visited him in the hospital and doubted that he would ever make it home.

Yet, I never heard him, not one time, not even in the hospital or in the nursing home, ever complain or grumble. Even when he lost his eye sight, his ability to walk, his ability to swallow just a sip of Diet Pepsi, Albert remained positive. In fact, I never heard him say anything negative, about himself or anyone for that matter. Even in his darkest moments of life, he loved his life, and loved those who were in his life.

Bro was always more concerned about others, than he was himself, especially his siblings. No matter how sick he was, if you asked him, he was always fine. And then he would ask you about others.

Doctor J,” he would say, lying in the hospital, unable to see, blood sugar over 200; “Have you seen Donna? How’s ol’ Carson and Sara doing? How are things going at the church? I got to get myself straight so I can come back there.”

And nearly every time before I left his side, even in ICU after his debilitating stroke in November, he would miraculously say to me, “Peace be with you.” And the miracle was not only that Albert could speak those words of peace, but was how it was obvious to all that in spite of every tribulation, Albert actually possessed this miraculous peace. And he truly wanted to share it with others.

The only way that can possibly explain how Albert endured the tribulations of his life is that the God of Jesus, somehow, some miraculous way came to Albert, obviously since he was a young boy, and filled him with this peace that surpasses all human understanding.

The disciples of Jesus also knew something about the ups and downs of life. Like a star football player, a teddy bear that the girls adored, or the vice president of a bank, the disciples had experienced some very high moments in life. They were with Jesus when he healed the sick, gave sight to the blind and raised the dead. Some of them even went to the mountaintop with Jesus and stood with him in the very presence of God. They rode triumphantly into Jerusalem with Jesus as little children lined the streets waving their palm branches.

And the disciples certainly knew something about tribulation. They were with Jesus when he was arrested in the garden. Some betrayed him. Others denied him. They all deserted him. They had made mistake after mistake, and they knew it. And they watched in horror as the one for whom they left their families and all forms of worldly security be tried, tortured and crucified.

Three days later, John writes that they were cowering in fear in a locked room. Rumors were floating all over town that the body of Jesus had been stolen, and the ones who destroyed Jesus and had taken his body would soon come to destroy and take them.

So, there they were, cowering behind locked doors. They could not have been more afraid. They were not unlike: a small boy who discovers his father’s suicide; a star athlete who is severely injured on a football field; or a well-respected and successful professional whose declining health had stripped nearly everything from him.

Then Jesus comes. We can’t explain how. The doors are locked. The windows are barred. But Jesus somehow, some miraculous way comes; he stands among them, and says: “Peace be with you.”

And this is not some superficial word of peace that denies or overlooks human tribulation and suffering. It is a genuine word of peace that acknowledges the pain of life, recognizes the wounds of today, but also the certain hope of a better tomorrow. Jesus shows them the wounds in his side and in his hands and says again, “Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, so I send you. When he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them, ‘Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.’”

The disciples then went out and lived the rest of their lives sharing the grace and peace of Christ with others. And they shared it to the end, even in the face of great persecution, suffering and death.

This is how I will always remember Bro. Like the first disciples, Albert was an imperfect man who suffered much tribulation in this world. However, although I cannot fully explain it, it was obvious to all that knew him that Jesus, somehow, some miraculous way, came to him. Through the love and faithfulness of his wife Ginny, certainly; through the love of his family and friends, definitely; and through divine and mysterious ways that surpasses all human understanding, Jesus came to him and filled him with this genuine peace, and then, sent him out into the world forgiving others, loving others, sharing the peace of Christ with other.

Days before Albert died, Becky said that Albert asked her if Chester could maybe spend the night with him in the nursing home. Becky said, for the first time, I could tell that he was somewhat afraid. And who would not be? In a nursing home, blind, nearly paralyzed, dying: he had more reasons to be afraid than anyone.

However, Becky said that when Albert breathed his last breath on Tuesday, that she had never seen anything so peaceful. I drove her and Chester home from the nursing home that day, and she kept saying, all the way home, “Thank you God, thank you God.”

The good news for all of us is that we have the certain hope that, once more, when Albert experienced his final tribulation on this earth, somehow, some miraculous way, Jesus once again came to Albert, as Jesus had obviously came so many times before, and lovingly tugged Albert’s ear saying: “Peace be with you. Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your heart be troubled, and do not let it be afraid” (John 14:27). Jesus came to him and filled him once more with a peace that is beyond all understanding, and this time, it is for eternity.

May this wonderful truth give peace to all of us who are still experiencing the tribulations of this world this day, tribulations that will continue in the days ahead. Through the memory of Bro, may we hear the risen Christ speak to us words that cannot be more true: “Peace be with you.”

A Mother’s Love

On February 14, 2015May 11, 2017 By Rev. Dr. Jarrett BanksIn MemorialsLeave a comment

The following was written for the memorial service for Alawoise Strickland Flanagan (July 29, 1935 – February 9, 2015)

In the very first chapter of our Bible, we have a beautiful portrait of the human vocation—a portrait of who we human beings were created to be, how we were created to live, during the relatively short time we have on this good earth.

So God created humankind in his image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. God blessed them, and God said to them, ‘Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth… (Genesis 1:27-28a).

With our thoughts this hour on the enormous Flanagan family, perhaps one of the first things that we glean from this portrait of who we were created to be, and how we were created to live, is: “Be fruitful and multiply.”

Harold and Alawoise certainly fulfilled this part of the human vocation, and they wasted no time in doing so. It was on this day, Valentine’s Day in 1958, that Harold proposed marriage to his Valentine, Alawoise.

Before the luncheon today, I said, “Harold, let me get this straight. You proposed on Valentine’s Day and were married on April 18, of the same year?

Harold said, “Did you see her nursing school picture on the communion table?”

“No,” I said. “Not yet.”

He said, “Well go look at that pretty girl, and you will understand why I did not want to wait.”

And “to be fruitful” they also did not wait as Jerry has often been called “a honeymoon baby.”

The beautiful family portrait on this table, this order of service with participation from some of the grandchildren, and this room filled with their offspring tell the rest of their story—a story of a two Valentines fulfilling their human vocation to “be fruitful and multiply.”

However, as beautiful as this story is, as beautiful as the Flanagan family is to this community and to our world, this is just a small part of Alawoise’s story. This is only part of her fulfillment of what it means to be human on this earth, a small part of her legacy. In Genesis we first read:

“So God created humankind in his image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.”

The primary way that we fulfill our human vocation, is not to be fruitful, but to be, to live, in the image of God. The good news for all for us this day is that Alawoise more than fulfilled this purpose for which she was created. As the poem recited by her granddaughter, Leigh Kathryn, so beautifully described, Alawoise perhaps best lived in the image of her God as a mother.

In Deuteronomy 32:18 we read that the Israelites are asked to remember “the Rock” that “bore” them; the God who gave them “birth.”

Throughout the Old Testament, God is portrayed as the mother of Israel. It is God who gave birth to Israel and loves Israel as a mother loves her child, unreservedly, unconditionally, tenaciously.

Growing up in the Flanagan house, there was never any doubt that Alawoise was “the Rock” who could always be counted on to love her children in the same manner. Just ask anyone who ever tried to cross any of them! As it was spoken by the prophet Hosea of God and her love of Israel: She would “fall upon them like a [mama] bear robbed of her cubs…” (Hosea 13:8a).

She was the constant care-taker, and she was the perpetual protector. As a mother, she was tried and true. And, let’s face it, let’s be honest this afternoon, I don’t know about Gayle, but you boys often tried her.

Like the time Harold taught Mark to drive a truck. Mark, how old were you? Six or seven? In trying to reach the gas-peddle, Mark recalls slipping off the seat and stomping on the gas, all the while poor Scott was sitting up high on some hay bales in the back. Well, as you can surmise, he wasn’t sitting up there very long.

Alawoise was tried by you boys with multiple broken bones, stiches, car accidents, rattle snakes, even gunshot wounds. But her love, her devotion and commitment to you never wavered, always remained true.

Even up to the time she had to go to the nursing home, each time she heard the town’s siren go off, she instinctively possessed this hair-trigger panic button that would immediately do a family roll call, one that is reminiscent of the motherly words of Jesus himself recorded by the Gospel of Luke:

Jerusalem, Jerusalem, …How often have I desired to gather your children together as a hen gathers her brood under her wings…

Even during these past difficult months, almost each time I visited her, Alawoise would do a roll call, asking me about the whereabouts of her family. Even when she was not in her right mind, lying sedated in a hospital bed, she would oftentimes ask me to help her to take things like barbeque and fried chicken off the stove for her Harold and her children.

Jerry, Gayle, Scott and Mark, and Harold, Alawoise lived her life to take care of your needs, to protect you, to love you unreservedly, unconditionally and tenaciously, and in so doing, she fulfilled the purpose for which she was created: living in the image of her motherly God and her Lord and Savior.

Now, if this was her only legacy, I believe it would be enough. However, there is much more.

The motherly love of Alawoise was in no way limited to her husband and children, or even to her grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Alawoise possessed a desire to gather many others under her maternal wings. She welcomed an exchange student and many others into the hospitality of her home. She lived to provide plenty of food, clean clothes, and a clean bed for anyone in need.

Her motherly love was experienced by many of us who have gathered here this day. We experienced it through Alawoise as a Sunday School Teacher, a deacon, a school nurse or as a Cub Scout Den Mother.

This broad and expansive motherly love of Alawoise was perhaps most ostensibly experienced during her twenty-six years as director of nursing and later as administer for the Guardian Care Nursing Home in Farmville. She loved the patients of the nursing home with the same tenacity with which she loved her own children.

She had absolutely no tolerance for any nursing home employee who did not treat a patient with the compassion. On the behalf of her patients, she did not hesitate to even stand against the company just as the prophet Isaiah spoke of God standing for her children: Thus says the Lord: “For a long time I have held my peace, I have kept still and restrained myself; now I will cry out like a woman in labor, I will gasp and pant.”

Alawoise lived in the image of God by suffering alongside and standing up for the least of these our brothers and our sisters, those who are the weakest, the most vulnerable members of society.

And for all of us who mourn this day this is truly good news. Alawoise was lived in the image of God. This means that when Alawoise suffered during these last difficult years, God, like a loving mother, also suffered. It is important for us to realize that God did not cause her suffering. God did not give her Parkinson’s disease. For what mother would do that to their child. Jesus once asked:

Is there anyone among you who, if your child asks for bread, will give a stone? Or if the child asks for a fish, will give a snake? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father [or Mother] in heaven give good things to those who ask!

Like a woman in labor or a mama bear, suffering and fighting for her cubs, God suffered with and fought with Alawoise. God did not take Alawoise from us with Parkinson’s Disease as some may say, but when she was in her weakest, most vulnerable, broken state, God came to her and gave her the best gift God had to give—the gift of God’s complete self. Thus, the best way to describe what happened on Monday morning of this week is that God came. God did not take, but graciously gave God’s self to her— tenaciously, completely, finally, eternally.

I don’t believe there is any other way to explain the very last words she said to me. Just days before she died, after suffering more than anyone one deserves, she opened her eyes, and spoke, not words of complaint or bitterness, but words of a loving mother, or of a child who has been comforted by her heavenly mother, asking me, “And how is your family.”

And the good news is that God will do the very same for us. God will come to each of us in our grief, in our brokenness, to each of God’s beloved children, and comfort us. In Isaiah 66 we read:

You shall nurse and be carried on her arm and dandled on her knees. As a mother comforts her child, so I will comfort you; you shall be comforted in Jerusalem.

As Alawoise taught us by living her life in the image of God, it is in God’s very divine, maternal nature to extend God’s peace and comfort to us all, especially to those in need. It is the nature of our God to place those of us who are hurting this day in the shadow of God’s maternal wings.

I began my remarks this afternoon with some of the first words of our Bible. I would like to close my remarks with some of the last words of our Bible. Hear now these very maternal words from Revelation:

And I saw the holy city, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. ³And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, ‘See, the home^* of God is among mortals. He will dwell^* with them; they will be his peoples, and God himself will be with them; he will wipe every tear from their eyes. Death will be no more; mourning and crying and pain will be no more, for the first things have passed away.

I am thankful, and I know that her family is thankful, that Alawoise fulfilled her human vocation on this earth by being fruitful and multiplying. But I believe we are more grateful this day that Alawoise fulfilled her vocation by living as she was created to live on this good earth: in the image of our motherly God who loves us all unreservedly, unconditionally, tenaciously, and eternally.

Divine Strength of John Barefoot

On January 24, 2015January 24, 2015 By Rev. Dr. Jarrett BanksIn MemorialsLeave a comment

Exodus 17:9-13 NRSV

In the 17^th chapter of the Book of Exodus we read the amazing story of how the Israelites defeated of their enemy, the Amaleks. The Amaleks were a group of nomads who attacked the Hebrews in the desert of Mount Sinai during the Exodus from Egyptian slavery. The Amaleks swooped in on the Israelites and cowardly killed those who were lagging behind: the weary, the old, the weak and frail.

For that is what the enemies of life do. They can attack us at any time, during our strongest times when we are young, but perhaps more so, during our weakest times, often when we are older. Cancer, heart disease, and debilitating strokes swoop in on many during that precious period of life that we call retirement, during that period of life where we look forward to well-earned rest, respite, and recreation.

John Barefoot was not the first person to receive a new set of golf clubs as a retirement gift that he would never use due to sickness or a disability.

And when the enemies of this life attack us, we are faced with a choice. We can surrender to our enemies; we can succumb to their attacks; or, like an old Army veteran, we can stand our ground and fight.

“Moses said to Joshua, ‘Choose some men for us and go out; and fight with Amalek.”

After faithfully serving this country in the US Army, after devoting his life to what is now Southern States, after raising two beautiful children, Roger and Linda, after thirty years of service through this community through the First Christian Church, John began to suffer debilitating strokes. Many men, in John’s shoes, surrender and succumb to such illnesses, especially after retirement. After all, they are weary and old; they no longer lack the strength within to fight. They can reach down and dig deep; however, there is just nothing left. No amount of digging will see them through.

However, men with faith in the God of Abraham and Isaac, Moses and Joshua, men with faith in the God revealed in the Risen Christ, understand that true strength does not come from within, but comes from and by the grace of God.

Moses said to Joshua: “Choose an army and fight. I, myself, retired a long time ago from fighting. I left the army years ago. I am too old, too tired, but I will stand on the top of a hill and raise the staff of God with my hands and summon the grace and strength of God to defeat our enemy.”

So Joshua did as Moses told him, and fought with Amalek, while Moses, Aaron, and Hur went up to the top of a hill.

Whenever Moses held up his hand, Moses noticed that Israel prevailed; and whenever he lowered his hand, he noticed that Amalek prevailed. [This was a certain sign that it was God, and God alone, who was giving the Israelites the grace, perseverance and strength to defeat their enemy].

There can be no other explanation for the strength and the perseverance of John Barefoot, especially during these last years of his life. As I have said, many in John’s shoes would have surrendered and succumbed twenty-five years ago. Possessing no reason to live, no sense of purpose, and no strength to fight, many men die shortly after their retirement.

Many more men die shortly after their wives pass away. Several years ago when Audrey died, it would not have surprised anyone if John followed her soon after.

But John kept going, kept persevering, kept fighting. Many studies have been made to identify symptoms of depression or the giving up on life. People who give up and surrender to the enemies of life become detached and disengaged from the world around them. They no longer care what their neighbors are up to. They become disinterested in their church, the local and national headlines, and interestingly, they no longer care about sports.

John possessed none of these symptoms. John always looked forward to visits from his church family. He absolutely loved taking a stroll in his wheelchair around the neighborhood and even downtown so he could see the people he loved. He cared about what was going on in the world, and he was in no way, shape or form disengaged from sports. He was an avid fan and loved rooting for the Wolfpack of NC State and the Atlanta Braves.

It was obvious to everyone that John, though weak and weary, never gave up. For as Isaiah 40:29 reads, John was a living testimony that “God gives strength to the weary, and to him who lacks might God increases power.” And in the 73^rd Psalm we read: “My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” John Barefoot was a living example to all of this great truth.

Our story continues in Exodus: “But Moses’ hands grew weary; so Aaron and Hur took a stone and put it under him, and he sat on it. And Aaron and Hur held up the hands of Moses, Aaron on one side and Hur on the other, and the hands of Moses were steady until the sun set.”

God has always used others to do God’s work in this world. God calls each of us to minister to one another. God uses us to supply God’s strength to those who are weak, to keep them steady, to help them fight the good fight, to finish the race. Such was the case in this victory of Amalek. Moses did not possess the strength to keep his hands raised through the duration of the battle, so God sent him Aaron and Hur who brought him a rock to sit upon and then held up each of his hands.

God also sent John others to give him support when he was the most weary. Church members visited. He children cared for him daily. And caregivers from Silvercare came to John’s aid. You could say that they brought him a rock and steadied his hands until the sun set. Pam Johnson, Catherine Walker and Savilla Jones were to John like Aaron and Hur were to Moses.

“And the hands of Moses were steady until the sun set. And Joshua defeated Amalek and his army.”

God always supplies us with strength for a purpose. God supplied Moses with strength through Aaron and Hur for the purpose of defeating the enemy. Thus, God did not supply John with strength, send him a rock through Pam, Catherine, Savilla and others who visited him and prayed for him just so John could watch a few more ballgames on TV. As Ephesians chapter 2 reads: “God will enable us to continue on in righteousness and to do the good works which the Lord has appointed for us.”

As God supplied Moses with the strength to keep his staff raised through the battle to defeat the enemy and to reveal the source that strength, I believe God supplied John with strength. As it was evident to all who encountered John—who saw his smile, heard his laughter, experienced his joy—that God was the source or his strength.

A month ago, a group of parents and children from our church came to John’s house to sing Christmas carols. One of the mothers that came with her children was someone who, just a couple of years ago, was not a part of any church. She said that she even avoided church and had many doubts about faith and the power of God.

But there, standing around John’s bed with others from the church singing Christmas carols, through John, something miraculous happened. God spoke. She said as she watched John donning a Santa hat and wearing a smile that was so amazing that it had to be divine, as she watched him sing along with the children the best that he could, with a joy, this amazing joy, a joy that had to come from heaven, she said that Christmas became real to her. Faith became real. God became real.

There is no telling how many people have been changed by God, how many battles have been won by God, how many of life’s enemies were defeated by God, through John Barefoot’s amazing strength in the midst of adversity, through John’s amazing joy in the midst of suffering, through God’s amazing grace in the midst of John’s life.

And the good news for us today is, that this same God, the God of Abraham and Isaac, the God of Moses and Joshua, the God revealed in the Risen Christ and in the life of John Barefoot, will give us strength in our grief, joy in our suffering and grace in our lives. God will send others: friends and family and church members to hold our hands, to keep them steady, until the sun sets, until the battle is won.

But the really good news is that the final battle, the battle with life’s final enemy has already been won. As Paul wrote to the Corinthians: “Death has been swallowed up in victory. O death, where is your victory? Where is your sting?”

The good news for all of us today is that as God has stood by John and has given him strength to battle the enemies of life, through our resurrected Lord, God has defeated death, and John is now and forever with his Lord.

May this good news help us now to live our lives as John lived his: Persevering with the strength of God, receiving help from friends and family who provide us a rock, living with the purpose of sharing the joy and the hope of the Lord with all people, until the sun sets here and rises forever in eternity. Amen.

Wounded Strength – A Testimony by Anthony Reiff

On December 6, 2014 By Rev. Dr. Jarrett BanksIn MemorialsLeave a comment

Anthony Reiff, 14, a freshman at Farmville Central, gave the following testimony during the Hanging of the Green Service at First Christian Church on November 30, 2014

Life hands you problems that you will have to deal with. These problems can cause mental and physical wounds. Some wounds are greater than others. I personally have more wounds than an average teenager. They are what make me who I am.

These wounds can make me weak. People will try to get my head and use my wounds to hurt me more. I will always have opponents who will try to take me down because of my wounds.

But these wounds can also make me stronger. If I give my life to Jesus, who was also wounded, he can take my wounds and make me stronger. Jesus also had people who tried to get in his head and hurt him more. Jesus had people who tried to take him down. But Jesus used those wounds to save the world, and to save me.

I look at it this way. Jesus, through the church, is training me to rise up against all of my troubles and never be defeated. Jesus is always in my corner.

Therefore, when people try to tell me that I am worthless, that I have no purpose, I am confident that God has given me a purpose. God has given you a purpose to be here on this earth too. You may not know what your purpose is but trust me, you will.

So, for all of you who are having problems, go home, look in a mirror and say, “I am a champion.” Because you are. You are a champion. Because God is always in your corner.

From Sorrow to Joy

On November 29, 2014November 29, 2014 By Rev. Dr. Jarrett BanksIn Memorials4 Comments

gone-fishing-600x399 Funeral Service for Hubert Chester Outland, Jr.

Aug 23, 1944 – Nov 26, 2014

Esther 9:20-23 NRSV

John 16:20-24 NRSV

Chester never did care too much for funerals. If he had it his way, we probably would not here this day. Yet, I am sure he knew that, unless he outlived all of us, there would be a service.

“Well, if you’ve got to have a service,” I can almost hear Chester say, with a slight grimace, “at least make it a celebration. Play and sing music that is uplifting. Say things that are hopeful. Be joyful.”

Chester certainly did not want this day to be a day of sadness, of mourning, but a day of gladness, of rejoicing. Instead of a sorrowful, solemn sermon, he would want me to preach a happy, hopeful one, to even tell a joke or two, assuring his friends and family that everything is going to be alright.

“Jarrett,” I can hear him say, “Just tell people: don’t worry. Sing a happy song. If anybody ask where I’m at, just tell them I’ve gone fishing. Just tell them I’ve gone fishing with Daddy and Mama on that beautiful shore in the sweet bye and bye. So, Jarrett, if you have to have a funeral, and as much as I despise a funeral I know you have to, please do me a favor and make it a celebration. And please, do everyone a favor, and try to keep it short.”

“Well, Chester, my good friend, that is much easier said than done.

Because, Chester, you just left us so suddenly. None of us were prepared for it. We are having a hard time accepting it. One minute you’re at the Country Club telling jokes about Obama and the next minute you’re gone. Even now, three days later, it seems more like some strange nightmare from which we cannot wake than it does the reality that we must accept.

And the timing of it, during the start of the holidays, seems to make it even more tragic. As I was sitting with Ben at the hospital, he painfully reminded me that this Thanksgiving was Mernie’s and your 45^th wedding anniversary. So Chester, please forgive us if we are somewhat slow and even reluctant to celebrate this day.”

And of course, this day is especially sad because we loved Chester so. And he loved us.

I know I am speaking for more than just me when I say that Chester loved me like I was family. I felt I could go to Chester for any kind of advice, from fishing, golf to finances. It was eight years ago that Chester taught me how to fry my first turkey for Thanksgiving. After I rubbed the bird down and injected it per Chester’s precise instructions, Chester made me come to his house to fry it, so he could supervise and prevent me from blowing myself up.

This is a difficult day, for how many of us here will not miss the way Chester loved us with his wonderful, yet peculiar sense of humor.

One day, he and Ben were fishing for trout off the train trestle in Beaufort. While they were fishing, one of his shoes got caught on the trestle, slipped off and fell in the inlet and was immediately swept away by the current. After a great day of fishing, a man noticed Ben and Chester walking off the trestle, Chester limping a bit, wearing just one shoe. The man asked, “Did you lose your shoe?” Chester said: “No, I found one.”

Yes, today is a sad day as we will miss his quick wit, his funny stories and his dry sarcasm. We will miss all the ways he made us smile, by playing a prank or by cooking us a meal.

This day is especially difficult for his family as Chester loved planning and cooking a meal, especially for a family gathering such as Thanksgiving. All who knew Chester knew that his family meant everything to him: his sister Niki and Eddie; his niece Lou, Tim and great nephew Nick; his daughter Emily, her fiancé Joey, his son Ben and Beth; his adopted grandchildren whom he loved as if they were his own blood, Hunter and Landon, his grandchildren Haley, and Jamison; and his wife of 45 years Mernie.

More than anything, Chester wanted all of you to be happy and fulfilled. For when you hurt, he hurt. When you were not satisfied, he was not satisfied. Although he had spent much putting Ben through school to go into law enforcement, he did not get upset when Ben changed his mind. As tight as Chester was, he never showed any disappointment. On the contrary, Chester encouraged Ben to do what was going to make him happy.

While her friends were critical of Emily’s selfless career choice to be a teacher in North Carolina, saying that she was never going to make any money, Chester encouraged Emily to follow her heart and do what was going to give her the greatest fulfillment. As much as he believed in the importance of making enough money to save some for a rainy day, he never complained that Emily did not have a more lucrative career.

And Mernie, for 45 years, Chester loved you, and although there were times you spent more money than he liked for you to, he would do anything he could do to provide for you, to care for you, to make you comfortable, to make you happy. It grieved him to watch you suffer as you have this past year.

And along with his family, this whole community is saddened this day, as Chester sacrificially protected us and our country when he was younger serving in the National Guard. Chester made this a better place to live as he gave himself in his retirement to the country club, and he as gave himself throughout his life to the service of this church as a faithful usher. He was a friend and encourager to so many, always doing all he could do to make us smile, bring us happiness.

So to transform this sad day into day of gladness, this day of sorrow into a day of rejoicing and celebration, is much easier said than done.

But this is what our faith in God is all about. Throughout history, God has always been in the business of transforming: transforming defeat into victory, despair into hope, and sorrow into joy. The cross of our Lord is just one example of this great truth.

In the wonderful little book of Esther, we are told about the Persian Empire’s plot to destroy the Jewish people. Under Queen Esther’s leadership, the Persians are defeated and Israel was saved. Mordecai, who had adopted Esther, and raised her as if she was his own blood, decreed that the days had been transformed “from sorrow into gladness and from mourning into a holiday; that they should make them days of feasting and gladness…”

Days of sorrow transformed into gladness. Days of mourning transformed into a holiday. Days of grief transformed into days of feasting and gladness. This is exactly what Chester Outland Jr. would want this day and in these days to come.

But, again, that seems easier said than done. It was just all so sudden. We have all lost so much. And right at Thanksgiving.

Again, I can almost hear Chester’s voice: “Well, that’s the whole reason you should be celebrating.”

“Yes, it was sudden,” I can hear Chester say, “But who on earth has ever said: ‘When it is my time to go, I hope it is slow and drawn out.’ Especially after watching my daddy suffer the way he did after his stroke. I have often said, ‘When it is my time, I hope it is sudden and fast.’ And I hope to be doing something that I love. I hope to be out there giving myself to something like the country club. I hope to be doing physically well enough to play golf if it’s not raining. Right before I go, I hope to feel good enough to tell one last joke about Obama.

And yes, you have lost much, for God had certainly blessed by life with much. God has blessed me in my life with good health, the ability to do what I loved, the opportunity to play golf and go fishing. God blessed me with great friends and a wonderful family. Yes, like all families, we have had some tough times, but I was able to see us through them. Ben and Emily have jobs that they love. Emily is happy again as Joey has come into her life. I have been able to be there for my grandkids, all of them. I have been able to show them that I love each one of them the same. And how many people can say that they have been happily married for 45 years to the same person?

And the timing? Although I missed cooking for my family, if I had to go sometime, (and we are going some time) I can think of no better time for me to go than this week of Thanksgiving. For I left this world grateful, grateful for the life that God had given me, grateful for my family, grateful for the life that I was given, grateful that in the end I did not suffer.

So, please be grateful with me, celebrate with me, rejoice with me, give thanks with me and trust God to do what God has done throughout history and take these days of sorrow and transform them into days gladness, take these days of mourning and make them into a holiday, take these days of grief and make them days of feasting and gladness. Prepare feasts for your loved ones, the way that I taught you. Love each other, the way I loved you. The way our Lord taught us to love. Make one another laugh. Make someone happy. And when you do, think of me, and be thankful.”

When Jesus was preparing his friends and family for his death, he spoke these beautiful words which were recorded by John:

Very truly, I tell you, you will weep and mourn…you will have pain, but your pain will turn into joy. When a woman is in labor, she has pain…But when her child is born, she no longer remembers the anguish because of the joy of having brought a human being into the world. So you have pain now; but I will see you again, and your hearts will rejoice, and no one will take your joy from you.

Just as Chester wanted, I believe our days of sadness will be transformed into days of gladness when, instead of being bitter for what we lost, we become grateful for what we had. These days of mourning will once more become holidays. However, that is not saying that we will not continue to have pain. Even when our hearts are bursting with gratitude, even we are the most thankful for what we had in a friend, a brother, a uncle, a father, a grandfather, and a husband, we will continue to have some pain. However, Jesus promises that all of our pain will one day be transformed into joy.

As a mother forgets her pain during labor when she holds her baby, Jesus says that when we see Chester again, when we see our Lord, all of the pain that we have this day and in the days to come will be transformed into joy.

So, for those of us with faith in Christ, this is a day of gladness and rejoicing. This is a day of celebration. This is a day of hope. And if we listen, we can almost hear Chester say:

“I am with Mama, and I am with Daddy. I am with my Lord. Tell people: don’t worry. Everything is going to be alright. Sing a happy song. If people ask where I’m at, just tell them: I’ve gone fishing.”

Tribute to Bill Lewis

On June 17, 2014July 1, 2014 By Rev. Dr. Jarrett BanksIn MemorialsLeave a comment

William Horace "Bill" Lewis, Jr. — William Horace “Bill” Lewis, Jr.

2 Timothy 4:6-18 NRSV

In this fragmented and fragile world, friends, true friends, honest to goodness friends, friends that can be trusted, are hard to come by.

Before the Apostle Paul died he lamented to Timothy that only Luke had remained by his side, and, at first, no one came and supported him; all had deserted him.

Novelist S.E. Hinton spoke to this harsh reality of life when she wrote: “If you have two friends in your lifetime, you’re lucky. If you have one good friend, you’re more than lucky.”

There is no doubt that the reason that many of you are here this afternoon is because you have been “more than lucky.” You are here because in Bill Lewis, you had one good friend, an honest-to-goodness friend in whom you trusted.

As an attorney here in Farmville, Bill Lewis earned your trust. When you purchased your first house or refinanced another, you, like my family and I, trusted Bill to be at your side, read and translate all of the legal jargon of the contract, and to honestly look after your interests. You trusted in Bill to always give honest and wise counsel. With Bill you never needed a second opinion.

And whether you sold a business and made a fortune, or had to close a business and file bankruptcy, you trusted in Bill as your faithful confidant. And for some of you, Bill was one of the few, if not the only person in this world, in whom you trusted completely.

I personally experienced Bill’s unwavering faithfulness when I had the privilege of being the pastor of his father Horace. During each of my visits with Horace in the last years of his life, Horace never failed to mention how good Bill was to him: always bringing his lunch, stopping by each day, sometimes several times a day, to make sure his needs were being met. During the time in his life when he needed someone the most, Horace could always trust Bill to be a faithful son.

And Charissa, you could always trust Bill as a faithful husband. He was trusted as your protector: When you were traveling by car Charissa, he was always reminding you to keep your car doors locked and to make sure you always had enough gas in the tank.

And when you were traveling on foot and he was with you, he always made sure that he walked on the sidewalk between you and traffic (And, metaphorically, isn’t that exactly what he did for so many of us as our attorney?).

Charissa will also always remember trusting Bill as a teacher: the caring way he taught his step sons how to tie a tie; place the handkerchief in their coat pocket; how to shave; have manners at the table; respect other people’s property; always tell the truth; how to treat a girl; how to love and care for nature and animals; of the importance of appreciation for sports, history, family, traditions; being a Southern gentlemen; respecting one’s mother; the importance of obeying the law; how to play the guitar; how to shoot a gun as well as properly taking care of it.

Charissa, you also trusted him as a faithful provider: always putting the needs of others ahead of his own needs. Your needs, the needs of his girls, the needs of his step sons, his sisters, his Aunt Nell, his home, the needs of his friends and the needs of his clients were always more important than his own needs.

And all of us could always trust Bill’s honesty and impeccable integrity. I don’t know if she is actually going to do it or not, but Charissa would tell Bill that if she outlived him, she wanted to engrave “Honest Abe” on his headstone.

One day, Charissa lost her engagement ring. When she told Bill, he filed it with their insurance company. And soon after the check arrived, but before it was cash or deposited, Charrisa reached into her pants pocket as she was getting ready for work one morning, and felt, you guessed it, the ring. Charrisa said that Bill nearly broke his neck trying to get to the post office that day to return the check!

You do not need a preacher to tell you that such honesty and trustworthiness in this world is very rare. We can easily relate to S.E. Hinton when she said that we “more than lucky” to have just one such friend in this world. We completely understand the Apostle Paul when he said, “All deserted me. Only Luke remains at my side.” The reality is that honest to goodness people in this world are very rare.

And I believe there is a good reason for this.

Honesty and trustworthiness always comes with a price. This is something that we may not always realize and seldom think about. People who can be truly be trusted, people with impeccable integrity carry an enormous burden.

Charissa calls Bill one of the biggest worriers in the world. He constantly worried about his work, always wanting to make sure he did everything right and treated everyone fairly. He would often wake up in the middle of the night with his clients and their problems on his mind. And this worry and anxiety extended into his personal life as he continually worried about Charissa: her health, her needs, her care, and even for the needs and care of their pets. Are they safe? Had they been fed? Did they have fresh water? Are the outside dogs in their enclosures and are in the inside dogs safe inside, and if they are, where are they? Why don’t they come in here and get in bed with me? How about the cats? Charissa said when he came home, if he did not immediately see them, he would call each one by name asking me her if she had seen them during the day.

Caring for others, caring for all of God’s creation, being faithful, being trustworthy, being honest, is costly. This is why Jesus said, “For the gate is narrow and the road is hard that leads to life, and there are few who find it.” This is why the Apostle Paul said only Luke remained at his side. And this is why so many of us here count Bill Lewis as one of the very few people in this world in whom we know we could trust.

Now hear the good news. In his letter to Timothy, Paul writes: “All deserted me, but the Lord stood by me and gave me strength…I was rescued from the lion’s mouth.The Lord will rescue me from every evil attack and save me for his heavenly kingdom. To him be the glory for ever and ever. Amen.”

The good news is that even when we do not have anyone in whom to trust on this earth, we can trust in God.

The late L.D. Johnson’s wonderful book, The Morning After the Death, ends with these words about the faithfulness of God.

“God can be trusted! In the last analysis, Christians have no more persuasive word. God can be trusted. That does not resolve all the mysteries or answer all the questions, but it gives us enough to build our lives around. God is trustworthy. He is Lord of life and death and He is to be trusted.”

The good news that helped Paul fight the good fight and finish his race was that God could be trusted. And the good news for each of us, especially those who have gathered here this afternoon is that God can be trusted.

God can be trusted when God says:

“I will keep you from all evil; I will keep your life. I will keep your going out and your coming in from this time on and for evermore.”

God can be trusted when God says:

“I will never leave nor forsake you. I am working all things together for the good. Neither death nor life, nor nothing in all of creation can separate you from my love.”

God can be trusted when God says,

“You will not die, but you will be changed, in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet.”

God can be trusted when God says,

“For this perishable body must put on imperishability, and this mortal body must put on immortality.”

God can be trusted when God says,

“One day the saying will be true: ‘Death has been swallowed up in victory.’ ‘Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?’”

The Holy Spirit can be trusted when the Spirit says:

“I am filling you even now with a peace that is beyond all understanding.”

The Holy Spirit can be trusted when the Spirit says:

“I am with you always, even until the end of the age. I will intercede upon your behalf, I will hear your cries, understand your groanings.”

The Holy Spirit can be trusted when the Spirit says,

“I will dwell with you and in you and live through you.”